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"Lovers' Quarrel" is the twelfth episode of the second season of Harley Quinn, and the twenty-fifth episode of the series overall. It was released on June 19, 2020 on DC Universe.

Synopsis[]

Darkseid agrees to give Psycho the world if he brings him the head of Harley Quinn, so Psycho controls Ivy to set her against Harley.

Plot[]

Poison Ivy, under the telepathic control of Doctor Psycho, wastes no time attacking Harley and attempting to kill her using the grass in front of Bethany's house. While they fight, the Joker watches in contented bemusement from within the house with a cup of coffee, commenting on how violence was "a hallmark of our relationship too". While he plans to order food, Ivy gains the upper hand and nearly kills Harley, but at the very last second Kite Man swoops in and saves her life, carrying her up into the air to safety. He explains the situation to Harley about Doctor Psycho taking over Gotham and mind-controlling people, and she assures him that his and Ivy's wedding will be on the next day.

Wonder Woman
Where is Doctor Psycho?
[Parademon screeches unintelligibly]
[Wonder Woman looks at Superman]
Superman
Oh, what? Because I'm an alien, I understand all alien languages?
[Wonder Woman's eye's widen in distress]
Superman
Okay. I know a little Parademon, but it's still a racist assumption. Be better.
[Wonder Woman rolls her eyes]
— Wonder Woman getting her privilege checked

Meanwhile, the newly unleashed Justice League is taking the fight to Doctor Psycho's Parademons. Superman lays waste to many with laser vision and attacks yet more of them directly; Batman, now fully recovered and masterful as ever, fends off and explodes numerous Parademons in rapid succession; and Wonder Woman uses her sword to scythe through Parademons like wheat. At last, Superman attacks the Parademon nest itself, throwing the colossal hive miles away from Gotham into the air. The battle now over, Wonder Woman kidnaps a Parademon and demands to know Doctor Psycho's location, using her Lasso of Truth to compel it to speak. However, since she doesn't understand Parademon, she looks to Superman for translation help, who is very offended.

Young King Shark bullies his little brother

Doctor Psycho himself is busy torturing King Shark in the Gotham Mall, forcing him to reveal his most embarrassing moments. His memories reveal himself as a younger shark, bullying his younger brother until he scrapes his knee. This causes a bleed that sends the younger King Shark into a feeding frenzy, at which point he rips his younger brother to shreds in front of his father's horrified expression. The memory amuses Doctor Psycho and the Riddler until a Parademon falls through the ceiling and projects a towering, angry hologram of Darkseid, who is not amused by Doctor Psycho's lack of progress in procuring Harley Quinn's head. Darkseid quickly picks up on Doctor Psycho's displeasure as he realizes that most of his Parademons have been defeated, and although Doctor Psycho tries to brush it off, Darkseid has no patience and declares that he will return at nightfall to collect someone's head; whose head it will be is up to Doctor Psycho. The Riddler is concerned, but Doctor Psycho has a plan.

Harley Quinn
Zombie eye, zombie eye!
Kite Man
Wait, wait! My kite senses are fluttering.
— After Sy Borgman's mechanical eye blinks

Sy has returned

Harley and Kite Man arrive at his apartment (strewn with his kite projects, having custom-built all his kites) and try to come up with a way to combat Doctor Psycho without being mind-controlled. Harley remembers that Sy Borgman was immune to the mind-control, and so pulls out his mechanical eye that he left her. As she wonders aloud about how he managed to resist the mind-control, the eye suddenly twitches, and although she nearly smashes the "zombie eye", Kite Man immediately stops her as he recognizes the blinks of the eye as Morse Code. Harley is surprised by this, but he explains that sailors and kiters know Morse Code.

Kite Man translates the code as "plug me in", at which point the eye sprouts RCA connectors to plug into a TV. Sy Borgman's face appears on screen, and although Harley thinks he's a ghost, he assures her that he has simply transferred his consciousness into a machine. He then explains that the CIA made him immune to mind-control so that the "Ruskies [couldn't] flip me into a Manchurian candidate and/or president of the United States" by implanting an anti-mind-control device in his skull. He offers to help them build such devices of their own, but as they lack the components, Kite Man will have to stay behind to help get Sy connected to the internet so that he can remotely control appliances in the apartment to assemble the devices himself.

Harley Quinn
Oh, my God! Superman's gonna kill Ivy!
Kite Man
Wasn't he trapped in a book? Who let Superman out of the book?
[Harley grins guiltily]
— Stroke of tactical genius

Justice League to the rescue

The Justice League flies by (with Batman pulled through the air behind them by a rope) to attack Ivy. Ivy, however, is able to singlehandedly hold the entire Justice League at bay due to Doctor Psycho's control, who happens to be bantering with the Riddler while controlling Ivy and the remnants of a Parademon horde all at once. Superman launches into a meandering warning to Ivy, which Wonder Woman succinctly summarizes as "we don't wanna have to take you out but if you don't give us another option, we will". In response, Clayface and King Shark emerge from Ivy's vegetation. Batman immediately writes them off as harmless and averse to violence, respectively, until Clayface grows to a towering height and King Shark screams in a frenzied blood rage.

In Kite Man's apartment, he is having a tough time connecting Sy to the internet and complains that he went to Oberlin and that he's not "Soldering Man", who is in fact in Milwaukee. Harley loses patience and screams about how the person she love will die if he doesn't succeed, which Kite Man is suspicious of, but Harley brushes it off, declares that she can't wait "until you graduate from DeVry", and steals one of his kites before he can question her further. He immediately worries that she won't be able to fly properly as it took him years to train to use kites, only for her to do it perfectly on her first try.

"Get off me, you angry dolphin."

Meanwhile at the battle with the Justice League, Batman nearly defeats King Shark with "shark repellent" (as he did in "Finding Mr. Right") but is stopped by Poison Ivy. Wonder Woman saves him from Ivy, but is quickly enveloped by Clayface. Superman tries to help as Ivy once again regains the upper hand, but cannot move as King Shark has bitten his ankle and won't let him move. Wonder Woman then explodes out of Clayface only to be immediately hit by a car thrown by Ivy. Although the Justice League mostly manage to regroup at this point, Ivy throws volley after volley of cars at them, forcing them back.

Harley arrives in the middle of this fight and tries to reason with Wonder Woman, since Harley and Ivy did save Themyscira, but when Wonder Woman is unmoved, Harley jumps on her sword, forcing it to cut her cheek. This sends King Shark into an even greater frenzy, and drives Wonder Woman off. Harley is also disgusted by Clayface, who could transform into a giant monster anytime but instead chose "ditzy co-eds and divorcees". She throws a rock at him, freeing Batman, and then tries to distract Superman while she reasons with Ivy. Before she can even finish a sentence, Ivy slaps Harley away, but this allows Superman to take the upper hand and launch her across Gotham.

Clayface chasing Batman

Under the calm, cool control of Doctor Psycho, Ivy doesn't panic and quickly creates a soft landing platform for herself out of plant matter, which then gets up and runs away, carrying her like a living palanquin fast enough to outpace even Superman's pursuit. The rest of the battle then splits up, with King Shark pursuing Wonder Woman while Clayface pursues Batman. Wonder Woman lures King Shark into Mister Freeze's old realm, where he quickly begins slipping on the ice, allowing Wonder Woman to knock him down. He rises again to bite her, but breaks his teeth on her gold bracelets, at which point she smashes his face with her shield, taking him out of the fight at last. Batman also finds his own victory; after getting cornered on the edge of a building, he spots two cooling systems, which he explodes to completely encapsulate Clayface in ice.

Ivy doesn't fall as easily as her compatriots however, and lures Superman into Riddler University, where she crushes him with a massive amalgamation of plants. Harley continues trying to reason with her, but Doctor Psycho's will is all that remains, and so Ivy wraps nimble plants about herself and snatches Harley. Her thin, stringy plants then carry them swiftly to the Gotham Mall, to Doctor Psycho, who intends to kill Harley and complete his compact with Darkseid to take over the earth. However, while Ivy is swift, Superman and Wonder Woman's flight keep them just behind her, and Batman himself, now among buildings, keeps the pace entirely unaided via the use of grappling hooks.

Kite Man
Oh, frick, I killed him.
Sy Borgman
No way, Jose! Synet is online!
Kite Man
Where are you?
[A mixer walks over]
Sy Borgman
Hey, let's build this anti-mind-control device and then if there's time, we'll make some fresh pasta.
Kite Man
Hell, yeah!
— Sy Borgman enters the internet

Kite Man finishes getting Sy to the internet, at which point he takes over household appliances to begin assembling the anti-mind-control device with Kite Man. While they work, Ivy reaches the top of Wayne Tower and then stands by doing nothing. Harley urges everyone to settle things without violence, a personal first for her, and Batman agrees that Mr. Wayne's insurance doesn't cover metahuman battles. Therefore, Batman surgically grabs Harley away from Ivy, Superman uses his laser vision to remove Ivy's plants, and Wonder Woman captures her with her Lasso of Truth, ending the fight in rapid succession.

Wow, this is so dramatic. It's like a CW show, if the cast was less hot. Yeah, you guys are right. Ivy's too dangerous to be left alive. You should have killed her when you had the chance. Because now? You're right where I want you.
Doctor Psycho speaks through Poison Ivy

"I can't let you kill her. I love her more than anything in this world:"

With the fight over, Harley begs the Justice League to spare Ivy, but both Superman and Wonder Woman deduce that Ivy is too dangerous to be allowed to run amok before Doctor Psycho has been defeated. Superman intends to send Ivy to the Phantom Zone, and is quite happy to send Harley with her if need be, but at that point Ivy suddenly starts mocking them all, Doctor Psycho and Ivy's voices speaking as one and saying that they should have killed Ivy while they could. Ivy then releases her pheromones on the Justice League, making them all fall in love with each other.

Harley is disgusted by Batman and Wonder Woman fawning all over each other and nearly gags when Superman suggests she grab his "pecs". However, while they're distracted, Ivy frees herself from the Lasso of Truth and snatches Ivy again, resuming her trek to the Gotham Mall. However, as Ivy drags Harley away, Kite Man flies overhead and lets Harley know that he's there to aid her. At the Gotham Mall itself, the Riddler and Doctor Psycho are gleeful at having defeated the Justice League and the capture of Harley Quinn, assuring their world domination.

Darkseid then arrives, fully prepared to unleash the armies of Apokolips for Doctor Psycho, but Doctor Psycho wants more. He wants to rule entire solar systems or galaxies, and to prove that he is competent, he'll make an example of Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn; by making them kill each other. However, while he's explaining this proposition to Darkseid, Kite Man sneaks up and gives Harley two anti-mind-control devices as a backup plan, while he intends to kiss Ivy to help bring her back from Doctor Psycho's control. He comes before her, pours his heart out, and kisses her - only for her to be totally unaffected and knock him out cold.

Doctor Psycho
Okay! Mr. Johnson's up! Girl on girl. So hot.
The Riddler
What are you, 13?
— Doctor Psycho is having the time of his life

Harley kisses Ivy

Watching this all unfold, Darkseid is mildly intrigued by "evil usurping love", as Doctor Psycho has just now revealed that Harley and Ivy are secret lovers (having stolen the knowledge from Ivy's mind). Ivy then fights Harley ferociously, to the point where Harley can no longer simply defend herself but must retaliate. The fight is bitter, and Harley nearly manages to get the anti-mind-control device in Ivy's ear, but she slaps it aside and overpowers her, nearly strangling her until Harley, who has run out of options, herself kisses Ivy - which actually does work, just long enough for Harley to put the anti-mind-control device in Ivy's ear.

Finally freed, Ivy easily defeats Doctor Psycho. Impressed by this change of events, Darkseid offers to restore their deal that Harley broke, claiming that "on your command, my armies shall spring forth and enslave the planet". Offered with total dominion of humanity, Harley turns it down, saying that she isn't a true supervillain after all. She goes on to say that all she's been doing is simply reacting; joining the Legion of Doom, revenge on the Joker, and revenge on the Injustice League were all responses, but now she knows what she truly wants. Darkseid, however, is completely baffled by this and declares that he will one day return to terraform the planet into a scrapyard. He then leaves.

The truth is revealed

Resolved, Harley once again pleads her case to Ivy for them to be together, take a leap of faith, and try. Before Ivy can respond, Kite Man wakes up, hopeful that he might have helped. However, all Kite Man is met with is Doctor Psycho's revenge: he creates a telepathic projection of Ivy's memories of her time having sex with Harley Quinn, for all of Gotham to see Ivy's infidelity. Clayface and King Shark are both surprised while Bane, who watches from his Pit, claims he knew all along. Commissioner Gordon and Batgirl cover each other's eyes while Joker laughs and comments that Harley is "still limber". Alfred covers the curtains of his window, only to quickly open them again to sneak a peak. Afterward, Doctor Psycho passes out while Kite Man is left stricken and speechless, looking between Harley and Ivy.

Cast and Characters[]

Main Cast[]

Guest Cast[]

Cameos[]

Trivia[]

  • Doctor Psycho refrences the movie Jaws, saying King Shark is like Jaws if he only ate fat people.
  • Harley saying "I'm Harley Quinn, I'm impetuous, I kiss people" and kissing Sy Borgman is the call-back to "Inner (Para) Demons" when she repeated that same mantra and continuously kissed the people around her in order to make light of her kiss with Ivy.
  • This episode brings back the Shark-Repellent Bat Spray, first seen in the episode "Finding Mr. Right" and a reference to the Batman T.V. series from 1966.
  • Doctor Psycho compares the melodrama on Wayne Tower to a "CW show, if the cast was less hot", a network known for mostly teen and young adult oriented shows with high drama and conventionally attractive casts.
    • The CW is also well-known for many shows based on DC properties, together known as the Arrowverse.
  • The line "Darkseid is... leaving" is a play on the phrase "Darkseid is" which frequesntly shows up in the comic books featuring him.

Gallery[]

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